


rebel without a cause

by jenrenfics



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Accidents, Alternate Universe - High School, Lee Jeno is James Dean, M/M, Protective Lee Jeno, Shy Huang Ren Jun, Slow Build, Slow Burn, Young Love, Young and dumb, renjun is shy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-04
Updated: 2019-11-06
Packaged: 2021-01-21 07:53:27
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,329
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21296069
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jenrenfics/pseuds/jenrenfics
Summary: there's something about the boy who's not scared of anything, or at least he seemingly tries to be, that renjun finds enthralling.
Relationships: Huang Ren Jun/Lee Jeno
Comments: 6
Kudos: 65





	1. no filter

**Author's Note:**

> title is based on the movie of the same title and the plot is also loosely inspired by it!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> renjun becomes friends with the guy who offered him a coat back at the police station.

This was his first time at the police station.

“You stay here, young boy. Don't go anywhere,” the officer said before making his way back to his desk as other policemen roamed around the place, their eyes focused on every single delinquent.

Renjun was sitting down on one of the wooden benches with his nanny beside him. He felt cold, though it wasn't cold. His body just felt like they were on ice every time he was anxious and jittery. Pulling the sleeve of his sweatshirt to hide his fingers, he looked around and saw  _ him _ .

Their eyes locked the moment Renjun's eyes landed on his.  _ He  _ was wearing a coat over a white dress shirt, and Renjun wondered if he came from a party or something. His eyes were drooping and his lips were curved up in a wry smile. Renjun realized the man was drunk.

Renjun didn't expect the guy to stand up and walk towards him, wobbling a bit but managing to stand in front of him. They didn't exchange any words; just stared at each other for god knows how long. And, to Renjun's surprise, the man took off his coat and handed it to him.

“You're cold,” he simply said to Renjun.

Renjun blushed. He felt tense and stiff, the ability to move any part of his body gone, as he looked back and forth from the coat to the stranger's face. There was a voice in his head that was encouraging him to grab the coat because he didn't want to seem snobby, and for this man to not look stupid. However, before he could reach out, an officer grabbed the guy's shoulders and dragged him inside one of the offices.

Wasted opportunity, Renjun thought, but he appreciated the gesture. His nanny brought an arm over his shoulder and pulled him close, caressing his head gently.

Not long after, he was brought in for questioning as well. The officer was a balding man, most likely in his late 50s, whose room smelled like a mixture of tobacco and vanilla perfume. Not a pleasant smell. He resisted the urge to cover his nose with a hand as he didn't need the old man to lecture him about being polite or whatnot before actually asking him about why he did what he did.

He took a seat and the officer, named Lee Soo Man based on the desk nameplate, turned around and tossed the cigar in the trash bin.

“So, Huang… Renjun…” Officer Lee said his name like it was something foreign. Renjun couldn't blame him, though, because he  _ was  _ a foreigner. “You're not Korean?”

“No. Chinese.”

“Oh. Okay.” He placed the folder on his desk. “Care to tell me why you stole that Moomin keychain from the dollar store?”

“I liked it. And I had no money.”

“Why?”

“Why what?”

“Why did you have no money?”

Renjun realized that Officer Lee wasn't interested in why he stole but instead wanted to know the deeper reasoning behind his actions. He was going to unearth Renjun, and it was both unnerving and comforting at the same time. “Because I ran away from home.”

“Care to tell me more? If you don't mind, that is.”

“It's just a stupid reason.” Renjun glanced up at Officer Lee and noticed that he was sitting on his chair, waiting for him to speak up more. “So, um… I feel pressured. From studying. Because of my parents.”

“Do they pressure you to study hard?”

“Yeah. And it's kinda taking a toll on my mental state.” Why was it so easy to be honest with Officer Lee? It wasn't like they had a conversation prior to this; this was their first meeting, and probably the last because Renjun had no plans to be back at this station next time. This, however, just further proved that his parents sucked at being parents if he was more comfortable sitting in a policeman's office and talking to him earnestly about his thoughts.

“I guess I shouldn't be talking to you, then.” Officer Lee stood up from his seat before adding, “I need to talk to your parents, maybe give them a little counselling.”

“But… you're not a counsellor?”

“I have a degree in psychology. I am also working as a family counsellor during weekends.”

“Wow.”

Officer Lee chuckled at Renjun's reaction. “Yeah. Wow. That's an appropriate response.”

His parents came knocking at the door a few minutes later and asked their son to be brought back to their house. Renjun spared one last glance at Officer Lee and gave him a small grin. The officer returned it with a nod of his head that must mean  _ don't worry, I'll knock some sense to your parents. _

\--

“He's not in the position to question how  _ we _ raise our child!”

Renjun flinched at the voice of his angry father downstairs, and he pulled the sheets closer to his chest. His father's rambling went on for a good five minutes while his mother tried her best to pacify her husband. It was a rare occurrence for them to be this loud since their way of arguing and disciplining Renjun was to be discreet: pinch Renjun's waist whenever they didn't like what he said, whisper-scolding him when necessary, giving him wide-eyed stares as a warning.

“I can't believe he told me ‘Do not pressure your son to study, let him have his rest time’ as if I don't make him rest on weekends! That's just bullshit!”

“But you do.” His mother said in a gentle tone. “You make him study on the weekends.”

“That's because he has no friends! How am I supposed to let him out if he has no friends? And besides, we have to be extra cautious. Do you see the number of teens in the station earlier? We don't want our son to be associated with any of them.”

“So are you saying that it's better if he doesn't have any friends at school?”

“No. What I'm saying is that if he has a friend, we have to make sure that friend is trustworthy and will not be a bad influence.”

Renjun listened more to their conversation, but the bottom line was clear: he had to have friends. So he was dead set on making one on Monday. It wouldn't be hard to be friends with someone, right?

\--

And as it turned out, making friends was hard.

No, it wasn't because the people around him weren't approachable. In fact, they were. But every time he tried to spark a conversation, his bubble of confidence would burst as soon as they noticed his presence and the next thing he'd do was turn around and flee. His latest attempt was during lunch. In the end, he settled on the vacant table at the very corner where a group of boisterous jocks played with their food. A disgusting sight to see, but this was high school, a place where everyone could be as dumb as they wanted to be. Sighing, he prodded at his meatball with a fork and decided not to eat at all.

“You're not hungry?”

Renjun glanced up. It was the guy from the station, the one who offered his coat because he was shivering. His hair was now styled and his clothes were casual unlike when he was back at the station; his clothes were very formal but wrinkled, and his hair was pointing at every direction. Nevertheless, he still looked as handsome as he did the first time Renjun saw him.

“Cat got in your tongue again? Or you just don't wanna talk to me at all?” asked the boy, sliding on the seat next to him. “By the way, just so I'm not so much of a stranger to you, lemme introduce myself. I'm Jeno. You are?”

“Renjun.”

“Huh. Cool name. How do you spell that?”

“R-e-n-j-u-n. Renjun.”

Jeno rubbed his chin with two fingers, probably contemplating how his name was spelt and the pronunciation of it was different from each other. Then, with a loud ‘aha!’ he said, “You're Chinese?”

Renjun nodded. “Yes, I am.”

“I'm such a genius.”

“It's the first time someone got it right about me being Chinese so, yeah, I guess you are a genius.”

“Your Korean is great, though.”

“Thank you.”

Renjun realized he was finally talking to someone. And not just someone, but the drunk boy from the station who apparently was also going at the same high school as Renjun did! Aside from being drunk, Jeno seemed harmless, although he was really giving give off a cocky aura to him.

“I have a question for you, by the way. And this is a question I've been meaning to ask you ever since that evening at the station. Why did you not accept my offer for a coat?”

This made Renjun blush. It was a topic he hoped they wouldn't broach, that he hoped Jeno would forget, that he thought Jeno wouldn't remember since he was drunk that night when he offered his coat. But that wasn't the case, after all. Jeno remembered how Renjun just stared at him like an idiot before the officer took Jeno away, not giving Renjun a chance to grab the coat. He couldn't say anything, and, as he rummaged for the right words to say, his blush grew hotter and redder. 

Finally, he said to Jeno, “It smelled like beer and I didn't want it transferring on my clothes.”

“Fair point.”

“Why were you even wearing formal clothes? Were you at a party or something?”

“Yup. Came back from a friend's party that was shitty as fuck because I was the only one dressed appropriately. They told me the theme was regal and all of them were dressed the opposite. Or they pranked me and there was no theme at all. I bet it was the second one.”

If he were to be honest, Renjun didn't expect Jeno to be this talkative. It was as if everything that came to his mind, Jeno would say immediately. No filters. And it was quite endearing.

“Also, I don't know if you already know this but we're actually classmates.”

“What?” This was new information for Renjun. “Since when?”

“Since the start of the school year. I guess you just don't notice me since I always sit at the back. And I'm always late. You always focus on the teachers and the lessons. I feel like you haven't moved your neck in years. But yeah, I'm your classmate.”

“So you knew me all along?”

“Of course. And that's why I offered you my coat. You always shiver. Well, not always, but there are times where you do despite the temperature not being low.”

Renjun pursed his lips. Jeno reached for his hand on the table and gave it a gentle squeeze. Renjun didn't withdraw.

“I wanna show you something, but you have to keep it a secret, okay?”

“Are you asking because I have a choice?”

Jeno chuckled. “No.”

“Well then, let's go before the bell rings.”

\--

They were at the rooftop of the school.

Renjun had thought it was something else entirely—an undiscovered animal, a secret hideout somewhere, a garden of some sort. When Jeno took him to the stairs that led to the prohibited rooftop area, Renjun stopped him by grabbing Jeno's arm.

“We're not allowed to make entry there! Are you nuts?” he'd said. “Someone might catch us!

“You're a reckless teen like I am. That's why you were at the police station, right? Why are you so scared, then?”

Renjun fought the urge to roll his eyes. “That was my first time, and the last. The reason why I was there was that I stole, or tried to steal, a Moomin keychain from a dollar store. I had no money with me so I decided to go for it, but there were scanners everywhere so I was caught.”

“You—” Jeno paused, nodding his head, perhaps realising something, then mildly shook his head in disbelief and wonderment. “OK. Um, let's have some fun, shall we?” And with that Jeno opened the trapdoor and climbed up.

Renjun followed suit, deciding to just roll with it since he was already here, silently praying that no one would discover them. He watched as Jeno sat on the ground, before lying down comfortably. Jeno turned sideways and gestured Renjun to come lie down beside him. Although hesitant at first, Renjun obliged.

“I always come here whenever I need to clear my head.”

“What is in your mind right now?”

“A lot.”

Renjun wanted to ask what those thoughts were but felt too invasive of Jeno's privacy so he just hummed in response.

Silence settled between them as a flock of birds flew overhead in a V-formation. It was a sight to behold, but Jeno beside him was covering his face with his jacket.

“Are you scared of birds?” asked Renjun.

“No. I'm just scared their poop might drop.”

Yup. Definitely no filter.

“Did you ever have a girlfriend?” Jeno asked out of the blue, a question that sounded out of context.

Yet, Renjun replied with, “Nope. Never had one.”

“A boyfriend, then?”

Renjun shook his head. “How about you?”

“I had. Mostly lasting for about a few months. They're all the same, though. They only want me because of the stories they hear about me. That I'm different from other men. Gentlemanly yet reckless at the same time. It's like I'm an extreme ride or something.”

Well, that was one way to describe Jeno. But if it were up to Renjun, he would say Jeno was an irony. He broke rules even though his behaviour showed no hint of malice or ill intent. He was good-natured.

“How does it feel?” asked Renjun.

“To have someone?”

“Yeah.”

Jeno used his elbow to support him to sit up from his lying position. “Well, here's the thing. You really shouldn't have high expectations when you get into any relationship. It will only break you. And I speak from experience.”

“What happened?”

“Let's just say my first love was also my first heartbreak.”

Renjun didn't know what to say. “Um…”

“You don't need to say anything,” said Jeno, probably sensing Renjun's discomfort. “It's all in the past now. And what's past stays in the past.” He looked at his watch. “Ten more minutes before lunch break is over. Wanna skip class?”

“No,” came his quick response.

“I'm just joking, Renjun. C'mon, you are no fun.”

No fun. Maybe it was the result of him not having friends. Sarcasm was a part of speech he never tried to speak, much less understood.

“Why haven't you jumped into any relationship? Are you scared?” Jeno asked.

“Not scared. People don't notice me, so there's that.”

“I do notice you, though.”

Renjun looked at Jeno with furrowed eyebrows.  _ What's that supposed to mean? _ he meant to ask, but Jeno must have noticed the gears in his head when he said, “I kinda have a photographic memory, especially to people who act so oddly like you. Ever since you didn't accept my coat, your face was clear as day here,” pointing at his temple.

“Oh,” was Renjun's only response.

Jeno's lips were parted as if he were about to say something, but opted for an understanding nod instead and heaved a sigh.

Silence enveloped them again. With it came the realization that Renjun might have found a friend for the first time in ages. He finally had a reason to be out of his house on weekends.

He pulled out his phone and clicked on the diary app he was using for quite some time now. Then, he wrote:  **I made a friend today. I hope he considers me a friend, too. Or is being friends supposed to be an unspoken agreement?**

Jeno turned his head sideways and Renjun caught sight of him. The other boy smiled. His heart leapt.

**Maybe it is an unspoken agreement.**

\--

Later that evening, he was apparently smiling when he walked inside the house because his mother's first question to him was, “Why do you look so happy?”

Renjun swallowed a big lump in his throat before telling his mother that he made a friend. His mother's eyes sparkled as if it was the greatest achievement Renjun ever had, and told Renjun to go get changed. “Dinner will soon be ready,” she said.

“Where's Dad?”

The glint in her eyes faded as soon as Renjun mentioned his father. She forced a smile and kept on stirring the pot. “He's busy at work. Won't be home tonight.”

Renjun nodded and went upstairs to his room. As he changed his clothes and discarded his old ones in the clothes bin, he couldn't help but notice the strain on her mother's voice when she spoke earlier.

His dad wasn't the best. Not the worst, either. But he only acted like a father when necessary. There was one time their relatives came to the house unannounced to surprise him in celebration of his fiftieth birthday and that day, he was nothing but good to Renjun. For once, he was a father to him, asking Renjun if he already ate the cake and giving him a slice, bragging Renjun's achievements to his aunts and uncles present, telling them how proud he was that he had a son like Renjun. 

Renjun knew his father was doing this for show, and he could've won Best Actor for it. When their relatives finally went back to their houses, his father went back to being a workaholic and not paying much attention to his wife and son.

If his father could act as a caring parent in front of an audience, why couldn't he do it without them? Was it too difficult for him? Did he regret ever having a child?

There was certainly a reason for his father's behaviour. Whatever it was, Renjun would like to know. Maybe if he knew, he would have a better understanding of their family's situation, the biggest elephant in the room whenever all three of them sit around the dining table.

\--

On Saturday, Renjun brought Jeno to his house and introduced him to his mother, his father still sleeping after pulling an all-nighter at the office. His mother instantly took a liking to Jeno. Who wouldn't, when everything that came out of Jeno's lips was compliments on how his mom looked younger than her actual age

“I'm pretty sure you've broken the hearts of a lot of women, haven't you, Jeno?”

Jeno shook his head in bemusement. “It's the other way around, Mrs. Huang. They break my heart.”

“Interesting!” his mother exclaimed and ushered both of the boys inside.

Jeno was a great listener as much as he was a great storyteller as well. Renjun's mom told Jeno stories about her younger years, how men used to be prim and proper just as women did. Those were stories that Renjun had heard before, so he busied himself with cooking hot pot.

He learned how to cook because his mother always said to him that a man cooking was more lovable than someone who couldn't. Why'd you marry Dad, then, he had asked. His mother had replied, your dad can cook scrambled eggs and that counts. 

“That looks good.”

Renjun winced in surprise at the sound of Jeno's voice coming from behind that he almost dropped the ladle he was holding.

“Oops. Sorry. Didn't mean to scare you. But wow, you cook?”

“Mom taught me. By the way, where is she?”

“Went out to buy groceries.” Jeno peered over his shoulder and took a sniff of the steam that was rising from the pot. “It smells good, too. People would fall for you if they knew you could cook.”

There was something in Jeno's voice when he said the last sentence, but Renjun couldn't pinpoint what it was. It was like Jeno was telling him…  _ something _ .

“I'll wait for you at the table.”

“Yeah, sure.”

Before Jeno exited the kitchen, he snapped a picture of the simmering hot pot. Renjun looked down, wishing his hair was long enough to hide his face.

His heart was beating fast. No, it wasn't out of nervousness. It was a whole other reason. He stopped stirring and looked back at Jeno, who was busy typing on his phone. There was a grin on his face that Renjun always found charming because he looked like a prince out of a fairy tale. Renjun let out a sigh, realization slowly dawning on him. 

As he turned the stove off, the fire in his chest burst to life.


	2. no goodbyes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> it's funny how a simple incident can lead to disastrous results, renjun realizes.

Somebody stole his wallet.

Renjun didn't realize it until he was about to buy a can of Sprite, his hand touching nothing but air inside his jean's pockets. It was also not in his backpack, although he found something else. There was a folded piece of paper. After opening it, he read:

HUANG RENJUN, LEMME HAVE A TASTE OF YOUR WEALTH JUST FOR TODAY, OKAY? I NEED TO RENT A NEW VIDEO GAME. *wink wink* THIS WON'T BE THE LAST TIME THOUGH SO WATCH OUT.

He crumpled the note before tossing it into the garbage bin beside the lockers. Then, he heard them laughing from a distance. They were in front of the science laboratory, looking at Renjun with amusement as they held up his brown leather wallet. One of them, the boy with pink hair and white sweatshirt, stuck out his tongue to tease Renjun and then walked away with his minions beside him.

There was nothing he could do. He didn't know self-defence. The boy was also notorious for being a big bully to almost everyone at school, and he just so happened to be the newest victim. 

“Was that your wallet?”

Renjun promptly turned around, almost hitting Jeno's face with the books he was holding. He nodded in reply.

“Why'd you let those pricks take it from you?”

“I can't fight them.”

“Then I'll do it for you.” Jeno was about to follow them, his hand already shaped in a fist, but Renjun grabbed his wrist and didn't let go until Jeno looked back at him.

Renjun didn't want Jeno to be hurt. Sure, Jeno might be an Adonis, a man with perfect body proportions and a handsome face to top it all off. He might be a bit troublesome. A bit careless at times, too. But Renjun couldn't let Jeno be wounded or bruised just because Renjun wasn't more observant of his surroundings. If he had, then this situation would've been avoided.

“It's my fault, anyway,” said Renjun. “I wasn't careful.”

Jeno's hand relaxed and this was Renjun's cue to let go of it. “Do not do that.”

“Do what?”

“Blame yourself.”

“But it is  _ my  _ fault.”

“No, it's not. If those guys aren't pricks, they wouldn't have done this to you. It's their fault, Renjun, not yours.”

Renjun was used to owning up to his mistakes. He always admitted if he did something wrong. For whatever reason, it was just much easier for him to blame himself. He remembered how his cousin broke the flower vase his dad gifted to his mom on their third anniversary. His cousin was just three, so instead of telling the truth, Renjun just told his parents that it was his fault for not looking after his cousin. That night, he received twenty hits in his calf with a broomstick courtesy of his father.

Maybe that was what kick-started this whole blaming himself habit, because ever since then, he always said he was at fault in sticky situations he got involved.

But Jeno, someone he only knew for a few weeks, was telling him to stop blaming himself. His parents, especially his father, would never ask Renjun if he was actually at fault or he was just trying to cover up other people's mistakes. They would never question him. They would just accept the fact and then move on.

“I'm sorry,” said Renjun, looking down at his feet.

“Don't be.” Jeno sighed. “Let's go home?”

Renjun nodded.

“Okay.”

\--

“Why are you doing so much for that Huang kid? He's rich but he's really fucking dumb. We should leech off of him as much as we can.”

“Do not speak about him as if you know him, Jaemin.”

Jeno dropped the cigarette on the ground and stepped on it with his shoe, crushing it underneath. He met up with the douchebag who stole Renjun's wallet, Jaemin. They knew each other because both of them had mutual friends, and they often come across each other at nightclubs and bars. Jeno wasn't feeling Jaemin's vibe since the very beginning, and he was right about his instincts all along.

They arranged this meeting at a seaside, and to Jeno's surprise, it seemed like Jaemin brought an audience along with him. Whatever this guy was planning, it wasn't going to end well, but he had to stand on his ground and anticipate what Jaemin had up his sleeves.

“Why? You his boyfriend or something?” asked Jaemin, earning himself whistles and laughter from his friends. 

“No.”

“Then why are you acting like one? Threatened that I might steal your little angel from you?”

“You're a disgusting piece of shit.”

Jaemin mockingly touched his heart and acted like he was in pain. “Oh my God! That comeback hurt so bad. Can you think of something else?”

“Maybe I should just punch you.”

“Oh no. No. That's not how we do things around here. See those cars?” Jaemin pointed to his left. There were two cars a few feet away. “I stole 'em. And what we gotta do with that is we're gonna play chicken racing.”

Jeno put his hands on his waist and listened to Jaemin's explanation of the ‘game’.

“Basically, there's a cliff a kilometre and a half away from us. We drive as fast as we can. Whoever jumps out of the car first is the loser. Simple as that.”

This chicken racing was an accident waiting to happen. And Jeno wasn't ready to risk his life. But… but for Renjun, he  _ must _ , no matter what the cost. So he agreed and went inside one of the Lamborghini 350 GTs they stole from god knows who. For a moment, he hesitated. Renjun came from a well-off family so that meant the money that Jaemin snatched was a dime for their family.

_ No, stop thinking that way.  _ He opened the car door and positioned himself on his seat, letting his back rest and wrapping his fingers around the steering wheel, familiarizing himself with the interior of the car. It definitely looked brand new, or it was just taken care of very well by its owner. 

“I already did this a lot of times and lemme tell ya, Jeno. I win all of them. So you could just, y'know, back out now.”

Jeno shot daggers at Jaemin and didn't respond.

“Well then. If that's your decision, then I guess I'll have to show you why people don't mess with me.”

A few minutes later, they were ready to race. Jeno looked at Jaemin, and the motherfucker only gave him a smirk and a bad finger. For someone who knew how to steal big things like cars, he sure acted like a spoiled brat—an unsurprising observation. Did his parents know about their sons' illegal activities? Jeno has heard a lot of shit Jaemin gets himself in: using drugs, selling smuggled cars to wealthy gangs, buying prostitutes… and the list goes on. He was, practically, a criminal in the making. A true delinquent.

One of Jaemin's friends' girlfriend a brunette wearing a pink crop top and white shorts that exposed a bit of her derriere, walked in front of their vehicles. She held up her hand…  _ ready…  _ then  _ go! _

His blood was rushing through his veins, and with every passing second, his grip on the wheel loosened, with his other hand holding tightly on the door handle, ready to jump out of it at any second. He wasn't paying attention to other things but himself. 

“Oh fuck!” he heard Jaemin say but resisted the urge to look at his opponent and focused on what he had to do next instead.

As soon as the sea came into view, he opened his door and jumped out of the vehicle, rolling over the ground as he heard a loud crashing sound from below. He took a few seconds to breathe and regain his composure, before standing upright using his knees as support. He turned back and noticed the horrified faces of Jaemin's friends. One of them was crying. Jeno was baffled at the sight before him so he looked around for Jaemin.

But Jaemin was nowhere to be found.

\--

The next day at school, Renjun was surprised and happy to see Jeno holding his wallet.

“How'd you get this?” asked Renjun, bewildered yet amazed at how Jeno was able to retrieve his stolen wallet from a notorious bully.

“I… I talked to him.” His voice was strained, even as Jeno was smiling at Renjun and he couldn't help but notice it but decided not to comment as he didn't want Jeno to see him as meddlesome.

“Oh. I didn't know you could settle things with him through talking. He always looks like you gotta do something for him before you get what you want out of him.”

“Actually about that…” Jeno scratched the back of his head. “I have something to tell you but we can't talk about it here. Let's go somewhere else.”

Somewhere else turned out to be the school backyard, which was oftentimes empty unless it was used for school activities, but otherwise, it was an abandoned area.

“What is it? You're worrying me.”

“You have all the right to be after I tell you. I lied about just talking to him.” Jeno bit his bottom lip and fiddled with a pebble using the tip of his shoe. His voice was shaky and Renjun couldn't help the anxiety rise from the pit of his stomach. “We did talk, but he was being an asshole. He said he's willing to give back your wallet if I win this… this godforsaken game.”

“What game?”

“Chicken racing.” Jeno raked his fingers through his hair, which Renjun found unnecessarily attractive and he had to mentally kick himself in the ass for shifting his attention. “We were at a seaside cliff and we have to drive our cars at maximum speed. Whoever jumps out first is the loser, the chicken. I managed to get out before the car fell off the cliff. I made sure I was almost at the edge so that I could get your wallet back.”

“That's so dangerous! Why did you have to do that? Where is that guy, anyway?”

“Uh… I'm about to tell that part.”

Renjun exhaled through his mouth. “What happened to him?”

“He died.”

Renjun had to double-check if he heard it right the first time. “W-What do you mean he died?”

“He wasn't able to get out of his car on time. I don't know why, but his friends think the locks on the car might be broken.”

Renjun couldn't believe what he was hearing. Jaemin plunged to his death inside the car. And as much as he thought that guy deserved it for being a total asshole to a lot of people, what happened was just horrible. 

“The cars we were driving exploded and someone might have alerted the cops because a few minutes later, we heard sirens. We ran off. We don't know what happened after.” Jeno's face was calm, but the shiver in his voice betrayed him. Jeno was scared. 

“I told this to my parents,” Jeno added. “They wanted us to move to a new city, but I said I want to turn myself in. I can't bear the weight of being a part of someone's death, even if it's indirect. So, I decided to leave the house.”

“Where are you sleeping now?”

“At an abandoned mansion. It's a spot I discovered years ago, and no one seemed to have found out about it yet.”

“Do you want me to stay with you there?” Renjun asked, surprising himself with the way he confidently delivered it. He then shrunk back and his confidence burst. “I mean… let me accompany you there. Or better yet, why don't you sleep at my house? We have a guest room there.”

“Nah. It's too much of a bother.” Jeno smiled, and this time it reached his ears. “But yeah, I would definitely love it if you stay with me at the mansion for one night.”

\--

One night turned into five nights.

Renjun always told his parents that he and Jeno were partners in a project that they both needed to accomplish before the weekends. His father didn't question him, which was new and weird, but he was grateful nonetheless.

“What's your star sign?” asked Jeno while they were in the middle of eating noodles in a cup.

“Aries. You?”

“Taurus. My birthday is on the 23rd of April.”

“Wait. 23rd of April?”

“Yeah.”

“No way! My birthday's on March 23!” This small piece of information was enough to make Renjun giddy. The two of them might now have a lot in common, in terms of both physical and intellect—Renjun was less athletic and more studious, Jeno was the opposite—but them having birthdays being one month apart was something Renjun could count as a commonality between him and Jeno.

Jeno chuckled and reached out to ruffle Renjun's hair. “You're way too cute. I don't know why people don't ask you out on a date.”

“Perhaps I'm just boring.”

“No, you're not.” Jeno sucked air through his teeth, contemplating his words. “Well, you are, sometimes,” he said, earning a well-deserved smack on the arm from Renjun, before continuing, “but you're not like a  _ boring  _ boring person. You get my drift?”

“Fine, fine. Whatever.” Renjun tried hard to act as if he was annoyed but he couldn't resist it and he just grinned. “By the way, I won't be staying here next week 'cause, y'know, it's the end of our  _ project _ .”

“Oh really? I thought we needed a month to finish that?” 

“Shut up.” Renjun pulled the sleeves of his sweatshirt to hide his hands as he was feeling cold again. The hot noodles they just ate didn't help much in lowering his body temperature. “My offer for you to stay at our house while you look for a cheap apartment still stands.”

“I'll think about. Actually, maybe I would. If the police don't catch me.”

\--

Sirens. That was the first thing he heard when his eyes fluttered open.

“To Mr. Lee Jeno, we know you are inside the house! This is the police! Clasp your hands at the back of your head and come outside immediately!” someone said through a speakerphone.

The situation he was in slowly sunk in and he abruptly stood up. Jeno was already awake and sitting on a wooden stool, arms folded across his chest, thinking deeply. Renjun went his way towards Jeno and took a seat next to him.

“Why are the police here? Did you call them?” asked Renjun.

Jeno shook his head. “I think one of Jaemin's friends did. They're all at the station, waiting for me.”

“How did you know?”

“One of them texted me this morning that they'll turn themselves in because they would get caught anyway. I told them to go ahead. Of course, the inevitable was going to happen.”

“But, it's not your fault Jaemin died! It was an accident!”

“I know.”

The police outside spoke again through the speaker, repeating the same instructions he said a while ago. “To Mr. Huang Renjun, please step outside carefully. Your parents are here to see you.”

_ Fuck.  _ Renjun couldn't help but curse, although his mind could only do it. Once they exit this mansion they considered a safe haven, their lives would change. For Renjun, this meant obviously not seeing Jeno for a long time. Or ever.

“What will happen with the two of us, then?” asked Renjun.

“I don't know.” Jeno placed his hand on Renjun's shoulder and traced a finger across his cheek. “I just wanna let you know that… whatever it is that we have, a friendship, or maybe more than a friendship, I cherish every moment that I have with you.”

Suddenly, a wave of emotions came rushing to Renjun, like a big splash to the face and it all became clear to him now. What he wanted,  _ who  _ he wanted. He held Jeno's hand, moved closer, leaned in, and gently pressed his lips on Jeno's own pair.

He wanted to let Jeno know this wasn't a parting kiss. This was a kiss that meant they would see each other soon if the universe allowed them to. This was a kiss that meant Renjun would wait for him and Jeno would hopefully do the same. This was a kiss that expressed how grateful he was that he knew Jeno. This was a kiss that signalled a new path that Renjun was ready to take.

When Renjun pulled away, Jeno was taking off his jacket. He put it on Renjun's lap, letting his hand rest there for a moment. “I hope you don't reject my offer for a jacket now.”

Renjun chuckled. “No. No, I won't.” He clutched the jacket on his lap and threw it over his shoulder. It smelled like Jeno: a mixture of tobacco and mint. He was weirded out by this before, but now it was a scent he had come to admire.

“Should we go now?”

Renjun inhaled through his nose. He didn't speak and just rose from his seat, holding out a hand for Jeno to take. 

Jeno held Renjun's hand tightly, a smile plastered across his face as if he feared nothing and no one.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> epilogue will be up in a few days so pls stay tuned!!!

**Author's Note:**

> ☆ kudos + comments are greatly appreciated and encouraged!!! twitter | curiouscat


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